Restaurant Vocab
In the restaurant business there's an extensive vocabulary that would rarely apply to the outside world. Terms like "grat", "expo", "4-top", "prep-sequence", "86", these are all very familiar in the everyday talk at most restaurants. But working in the rib factory that I do, we've developed a much more advanced form of restaurant lingo. Tonight I will teach you just a few terms that are unique to our place.
Pre-check tip none re-adjust. verb 1. This is when the customer places the tip on the table before the check ever hits the table. Once they've received the check, the customer looks at the total and no matter what it is, they do not change the amount of the tip they've already put down.
Pre-check tip none re-adjuster. noun 1. The dickhead that does the shit I just told you about above. 2. Complete asshole.
Once in a great while you get a customer that defies the odds. These people put down the tip ahead of time, but once they get the check, they actually look it over, pull back the original amount, and adjust it to an acceptable tip. This is known as the Pull-back re-adjust. A very rare, yet much appreciated occurance.
The Verbal. verb 1. The act of complimenting a server on how great a job they did, in lue of actually leaving a money tip. 2. A ploy used by cheap fucks to avoid having to leave money for a tip.
There's nothing worst then a verbal. Where the hell to people get the balls to pull a stunt like this? Do these assholes really think that we appreciate the compliment, especially when our tip percentage is taking a steel-toe kick in the nutsack? Un-fucking-believe! Come on people!
Sameside Sitters. noun 1. A couple that sits on the same side of the table, usually in a booth. Most of the time partaking in public displays of affection that makes everyone around them want to puke.
I can't stand this shit. How the hell can two people comfortably sit on the same side of a booth and have a decent conversation? Let alone a whole meal of food. I once had a couple of sameside sitters come in at noon to eat lunch. They proceeded to sit there for next six and half hours drinking coronas and pinto grigios, chatting it up, and making out the whole time. I swear the entire time each one of them had a hand under the table. How many hj's can a guy possibly get in a six hour period of time? Fucking disgusting. And to top it all off, these people were Sameside Sitting, Pre-check Tip None re-adjusting, 10% Charlie's. I think you can all figure that one out. Thanks for tuning in armboners.
Pre-check tip none re-adjust. verb 1. This is when the customer places the tip on the table before the check ever hits the table. Once they've received the check, the customer looks at the total and no matter what it is, they do not change the amount of the tip they've already put down.
Pre-check tip none re-adjuster. noun 1. The dickhead that does the shit I just told you about above. 2. Complete asshole.
Once in a great while you get a customer that defies the odds. These people put down the tip ahead of time, but once they get the check, they actually look it over, pull back the original amount, and adjust it to an acceptable tip. This is known as the Pull-back re-adjust. A very rare, yet much appreciated occurance.
The Verbal. verb 1. The act of complimenting a server on how great a job they did, in lue of actually leaving a money tip. 2. A ploy used by cheap fucks to avoid having to leave money for a tip.
There's nothing worst then a verbal. Where the hell to people get the balls to pull a stunt like this? Do these assholes really think that we appreciate the compliment, especially when our tip percentage is taking a steel-toe kick in the nutsack? Un-fucking-believe! Come on people!
Sameside Sitters. noun 1. A couple that sits on the same side of the table, usually in a booth. Most of the time partaking in public displays of affection that makes everyone around them want to puke.
I can't stand this shit. How the hell can two people comfortably sit on the same side of a booth and have a decent conversation? Let alone a whole meal of food. I once had a couple of sameside sitters come in at noon to eat lunch. They proceeded to sit there for next six and half hours drinking coronas and pinto grigios, chatting it up, and making out the whole time. I swear the entire time each one of them had a hand under the table. How many hj's can a guy possibly get in a six hour period of time? Fucking disgusting. And to top it all off, these people were Sameside Sitting, Pre-check Tip None re-adjusting, 10% Charlie's. I think you can all figure that one out. Thanks for tuning in armboners.
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